- Back to the Ho -

Yep, it's official - I'm back in the Potato State. I got a phone call Monday and arrived this afternoon. Talk about short notice!

But the timing wasn't bad at all. It's not like I have any other pressing issues in my life. The thing I'm most worried about is actually having to be up before noon. It's been a while since I've had to do it and I'm not sure I'll remember how.

Anyway, I'm hoping to find an apartment this time around and take care of some other business while I'm here. And perhaps nail down a date for the big move. I'll keep you updated.

- Warm Toilet Seats and Other Nonsense -

This isn't a problem I've had to deal with since college, however, after sharing living quarters with my brother and sister-in-law over this past Easter weekend, it has again reared its ugly head.

I forgot just how much I hated them. The mere thought that someone was there before me doing their business (a.k.a dropping the kids off at the pool, freeing the chocolate hostages, taking the Browns to the Super Bowl, etc.) make me nauseous.

I had some other deep insights over the weekend. Actually, I can't take full credit for this one because Andrew brought it up, but why are gay people always broadcasting their homosexuality (i.e. rainbows, t-shirts, jewelry, etc.)? You don't see straight people proudly proclaiming the fact that they're heterosexual. I could say a lot more about this, but sometimes you just have to know when enough is enough.

Also, this one hit me today at the Grand Buffet - haha, I know what you're thinking, and that hit me too, about an hour later - Chinese food is really just fair food, with an Asian twist. Everything is deep fried baby!

And finally, a few deep thoughts from the Mitch vault - "Chicago is known as the Windy City, and Montana is called the Big Sky State, so I think that we should somehow combine the two to create the ultimate kite-flying experience."

"I wear v-neck shirts, this is a v-neck I got on. My neck is so fragile man, I can't wear a regular neck shirt, it hurts. And I especially hate turtle necks. Wearing a turtle neck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Like if you wear a turtle neck and a backpack it's like a weak midget is trying to bring you down."

- Cap'n Out

- Seder Meal Wreaks Havoc on Cornhole! -

On the Thursday before Easter, I participated in a Seder Meal. For those readers who don't know, it's basically a mock Passover celebration. Reverend Welch did an awesome job of hosting the meal (then again, it may have been a complete train wreck, but since he's the most "Jewish" guy I know, I'm going to trust him). I definitely have a much better understanding/appreciation for the whole Upper Room story (and Easter in general). Jon made an excellent point - the more you understand Judaism, the better you're going to understand scripture and what God is trying to say.

Aside from this I must say I'm not terribly impressed with the Jews menu selection. The lamb wasn't bad at all. However, it was greatly overshadowed by the bitter herbs, unleavened bread, and nasty looking apple stuff (which I can't remember the name of). Not exactly appetizing, or filling. By the time I arrived home, an hour later, the strange concoction had taken its toll on my intestines. Hence the title of this blog.

- Nuff Said

- More Randomness -

"I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is just blurry. And that's extra scary to me, because there's a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside. "Run. He's fuzzy. Get outta here."

"I'd hate to be a giraffe with a sore throat. "

"The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how much you play, you'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once, they're relentless. "

- Sweet Tea - and sweeter ideas -

I've been doing a lot of cooking during my unemployment. For example, tonight I made spiced chickpeas with grilled tortillas. I guessed it turned out alright, though, I doubt I will attempt it again. I also made sweat tea this afternoon, which is why I pose this question - what's the best prank you've ever pulled? For those of you who don't know, mine involved a thousand tea bags and a 10,000 gallon pool - my own Boston Tea Party.

I've decided to add a new segment to this blog. Each week I will select a reader posed topic (the first one I receive that week, starting Sunday night), and do a blog over it. This allows you, the reader, to be more involved and forces me to stay up to date. So what's it going to be?

I'm also going to start throwing in Mitch Hedberg quotes. These have been edited for content to better suit our viewing audience, but hopefully will entertain, as well give you something else to comment on - which, in case you didn't know, is very appropriate because if people aren't reading, then what's the point?

"Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus? "

- Bring on the firing squad...or comments

- Soup de jour -

Some people have been asking, so here's the recipe for the sausage and potato soup (just like Olive Garden). It's super-easy, so enjoy!

2 3/4 Cup Chicken broth
1/4 Cup Heavy Cream
1 or 2 Potatoes (I slice them about a quarter of an inch thick)
1/2 lb Italian Sausage (cooked)
1/4 tsp. Red Pepper Flakes
Salt and pepper to taste.
Combine together and simmer approx. one hour

The past couple times I've doubled the recipe - because the sausage I use comes in a one pound package and leftovers are great!

Let me know how it turns out. Happy cooking!

- Monkey Business -

I finally got around to watching King Kong last night. I know...I know...a little past due, but better late than never...at least that's the rumor. Not a bad movie, especially since I'd never seen the original in its entirety. I doubt I would have liked it as well as this one anyway. It's one of those "glad I saw it, but doubt I'll be adding it to the collection" films. Peter Jackson did a great job (I expected nothing less), but what is it with him and three hour long epics? I would hate to see him make a documentary...snore...

I had my doubts going in - I wasn't sure if Jack Black could star in a serious movie, but I was pleasantly surprised. He played the part well. Speaking of Senor Black - his new movie, "Nacho Libre" looks awesome!

The best part was the final scene with all the planes and Kong on the Empire State Building. Sure it took a squadron of biplanes with machine guns to take him down, but somebody had to teach the overgrown primate a lesson.

I also have a new favorite quote: "It wasn't the airplanes. It was beauty killed the beast."

- Ebert and Roper

- Way Too Long -

So, when I started this blog, I decided I wasn't going to be one of those people that blog like once a month and leave everybody hanging. Sadly, I have turned into that person. Forgive me father, for I have sinned. It's been two weeks since my last blog.

Now that confessional is out of the way - an update (it's the least I can do for all my adoring fans!). Actually, the whole reason I'm not blogging is that I really don't have much to write about. When life consists of watching movies and doing housework, well, it doesn't exactly make for good reading.

Movie-wise, I saw "V for Vendetta" last weekend and am hoping to see "Failure to Launch" soon. We rented "Finding Neverland" (a movie I wouldn't mind owning), "Star Wars III", "Psycho", and the "English Patient". I know, we had slim pickins' from the public library. Why, from the library? That's another story, which Shannon won't allow me to publish - let's just say I can only handle one $70 fine (and we didn't even get to keep the movie).

Tonight, I will be making sausage and potato soup (tastes just like the stuff at Olive Garden). We'll probably be enjoying dinner in front of the TV watching the Final Four (not that I even care who's playing). If I get bored of that, I may indulge myself and watch King Kong or Brother's Grimm. Oh, the options!

If you can think of anything better to do, let me know...